An open letter to MN drivers:

Dear Drivers,

Here's a tip: When merging, you must be at the same speed as the traffic into which you are entering. Use the 'on-ramp' to gain proper acceleration prior to 'signalling' your turn. The pedal to the right of the break, covered with M&M wrappers, is the gas. Press it. Keep pressing it. Only then can safe, easy passage be assured.

I'm looking out for you, bad drivers. Obey the simple vehicular rules, and we can all peacefully coexist. Now get out of my way.